It's the Little Things

Since I love sewing and working on lots of different projects, I have been getting a couple different things together for Richard, Gideon and Me, (We're going to be going to a Renaissance Fair soon, and want to go all out.) For my costume I wanted to find an epic chain belt to complete the ensemble. After looking through Amazon and other online stores and not finding something that I liked. I decided to see if I could make one. So I got Gideon ready while Richard changed into warmer clothes and off we went. On the way down we were listening to John Gottman's The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. We stopped it often to discuss the different principles and go over the relationship quizzes. Unfortunately about 10 minutes from Lowe's (where we were looking for some decorative chain) Gideon decided that he had had it with the car-seat and started screaming. Richard and I immediately started rattling off the different  nursery rhymes that have constantly been stuck in our heads to help calm Giddy, and it seamed to work. We even alternated the different lines in the songs. It felt pretty good to be in sync like that.  When we got to Lowe's and were able to get Giddy out he was ecstatic. He insisted on walking everywhere. He took hold of Richards finger and we proceeded to look around, Richard decided to race and see who would find it first, he did. Unfortunately it wasn't quite right so we continued on our quest and ended up in Joann's. Gideon was much happier on this shorter car trip. When we got to Joann's we decided that we would make my belt instead. Richard and Gideon helped find all of the pieces that we would need to make the best belt ever. Once we had checked out we stopped next door at the "free zoo" aka Petsmart so that Giddy could get all of his wiggles out before the long (at least for him) trip home. 

Now you may ask, "Why did I need to read the long spiel about your shopping trip?"

The reason I did this is because to me it illustrated Gottman's principle of Love Maps. He said, "There are few greater gifts a couple can give other than the joy that comes from feeling known and understood." While I could have easily gone down to Idaho Falls by myself and not had to deal with a screaming child, I wanted to do something together as a family. It is when you let the little everyday things become mundane that you can grow apart as a couple. Letting the trip to the store become more that a checklist of things to do. Ultimately it is when the little things fall to the wayside that the cracks and bigger problems occur in your relationship. Now you don't have to always make a trip for eggs a family outing, but sometimes it's a great way to shake up the little things.